I dun really know how I should feel now. Everything I grew up believing in is just tumbling down like a deck of cards. My family isn’t holding and I dun have the courage and strength to keep it together. I cannot see a course of action that I can take that could possibly help the already bad situation.

There isn’t a forever, if one does not try to fight for it and sacrifice whatever they have. My family is falling apart all because of wrong decisions made along the way. Who can we blame? Suddenly I dun feel all the anger and righteous convictions that I said I would feel in such a situation, all I feel is a deep sense of lost and sadness that I am helpless to. There is so many things that I wish I was brave enough to say but I know when I try, it will only come out all wrong and skewed with tears and anguish. I am the man in the family but I dun have a clue on what I should do, only to be by her side when it happens.

Acquiesce: vrb

Assent, agree without protesting

Although she appeared to acquiesce to her employer’s suggestions, I could tell she had reservations.

Nothings changed, I am still waiting. Last night I could not sleep a wink because of a bunch of relentless mosquitoes sucking the majority of my blood leaving me oddly pale when I woke up in the morning... Due to my insomnia, I tried to disturb my dog from her beauty sleep but was unsuccessful as she gave me an unappreciative look and when straight back to her previous position immune to any tussle afterwards.

After tossing from bed to floor fanning off the evil mosquitoes, one would realize the amount of retrospective thoughts that an insomniac has to suffer is over whelming causing the prolonging of such a sad state of affair.

On a similarly pessimistic look, how does one surround himself with friends and love ones and still manage to feel lonely? What would be the main contributing factor of such a contradicting and unsatisfiable emotion? Perhaps the song “Twentysomething” by Jamie Cullem best describes such irrational feelings.

Somewhere along the way from being a child to a teenager and now a young adult, a void was formed, a void which I have been desperately trying to fill with goals, ambitions, dreams and relationships. Perhaps the solution is as simple as contentment.